On idle.

What do you do when you’re content in your own silence? I lay here after work, a job I enjoy. I desire health and wealth, and those are taken care of. I have loving friends and family, and I think I get a decent dose of them. I lay here on my bed unsure of what to do next; it’s hard to have a desire to do when all your needs have been met. Maslow says to self-actualise, but I feel as if I do that through my work. I don’t desire money for the sheer sake of it; I desire only money for security and to eat meals with my friends and to occasionally travel 4 weeks a year. I’ve done so much personal development over many years, and I’ve reached a point where I am happy and content; I don’t desire much. I feel as if I require a purpose but I’d be just arbitrarily imposing a purpose on a conscious experience that is dictated by bodily function. We are alive to survive, but when you’re surviving what do you do next? Is there any reason to do anything else? Should I just do what induces pleasurable sensation?

If life inherently has no purpose, would it be a benefit to myself to give it purpose? Is it better to apply meaning to my life so that my free time has a purpose? If so, what purpose should I apply? How do I determine this? Or is it better to live a hedonistic life, within the scope of health and well-being?

Whelp.

Signed,

Tentative.

2 thoughts on “On idle.

  1. I am currently at a stage where I am shedding old beliefs, conditioning and brainwashing that I have been fed my whole life. Awakening is a beautiful thing but it also poses a lot of questions for me; what is my purpose in life? How can I serve and be my highest self? What have I been put on this earth to accomplish? I’ve come to realise that as long as Im working on my best self that all these questions will be answered in time as my divine purpose discloses itself to me. I am learning to trust, let go and go within. I am learning to notice signs in the form of numbers or coincidences, conversations, intuition. A lull is perfectly OK. Its a chance to reassess, reflect, be in the moment, and practice self love. I often get frustrated that I am not progressing spiritually as fast as I would like (I have a lot of years to make up for) but then I remind myself that the universe knows best and I am exactly where I need to be, as are you. 😊 Sending love and light πŸ™

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